Thank you Lord for all the people who have good hearts

I always thank God for creating people who have good and big hearts. At times, I feel so miserable of losing my husband Joey, I just think of those who are always there at my side when I need help. Those people who didn’t leave me when I needed comfort and console.

I am very much thankful of having a wonderful family and friends who support me all the time. They give me strength and for all time let me feel I’m not alone and I’m not dejected.

I also wanna thank this lovable family for conferring me stuffs that I know will make a big help to me. Before, they supplied me Materna milk (which really helps my baby to be strong and healthy), they also offered to buy me pregnancy vitamins but because of comprising this shameful feeling of mine I refuse, hehe… for I thought to myself it’s too much… Then, another one again… my baby’s very first gift. It was a set of pillows and bed for my baby. Whooah… is it too much? Hehe… I don’t wanna say it’s too much (coz I’m waiting for more) LOL. Hehe… I’m talking about this mushroom family, Yena, Yobib and Ate Niko. Thanks for all. I really appreciate all the things you’ve given and done for me. I’m sure wherever Joey is now, he is very much thankful too.

I believe now in sayings that when there is someone/something taken from you, there will be replacement for it. Though you lost one, it will be replaced with many ones. So I must really thank God for having them in my life.

I had a DATE!

Yeah… this is true! I had a date with my mom… hehe! Today I went to the hospital with her for my check up. Because my husband can’t be with me anymore, mom accompanies me every time she’s available. After my check-up, since it was a very humid day, we decided to have a walk inside the mall. That was for dual purpose, to relax and of course for my exercise. As I am now quite near for delivery (3 weeks to go). We had lunch together inside the place. We already planned to watch a movie last time but we didn’t make it so we made it today. Mom wants to spot Dingdong and Marian movie (feeling teenager… hehe) but unfortunately the movie was not available in the cinema. I don’t know what the reason is, and because of that we came up watching a comedy movie. We chose it coz of the casts. I’m an Angelica Panganiban fanatic that’s the reason. Plus having Eugene Domingo and John Lapuz there was a very big hit. It was a very great movie, I like it much. For it made me and mama laugh so loud. The story of the movie is very complicated because of the story itself… hehehe! (really complicated) but I’m sure if you will see it, you’ll love it. By the way, the title of this movie is “HERE COMES THE BRIDE”.

Movies really delight me in many ways. It can make me smile and unwind, sometimes it can make all my problems vanished for a while. It has a big help for those people who need to lighten up their days. So, I do it for a habit. Hehe

There's a reason for every thing...

It was 3 months ago when my husband Joey died from a motor accident, 10 days after our wedding. It was not really easy for me, for being in that condition, I was on my 4^th month way that time.

Joey and I had been together for seven years before this little angel yield in me. When we found out about my pregnancy, we immediately settled on to have our wedding 3 months after. January 23, 2010 when we held our Wedding day. We were very happy because finally we are now married couple plus the baby inside was a great blessing. But after so many joyful feelings, they changed into sadness and sorrow. February 03, the day my husband died was really a big mess for me. I couldn’t believe that this will happen, he is a very good person… they said it was the real reason why God took him back so easy. Sometimes I ask Him why of all people, He chose Joey to be with him that early. He hasn’t seen his daughter yet, he’s very excited of having a baby but how is it now? He cannot carry her in his hands because he is now gone. Until now it is really painful to me, it caused deep wounds in my heart. It’s really hard to accept but certainly I have to… they always say that God has His own reason for everything. Maybe time will tell, time can heal all the pains it caused me.

I know it’s not good to ask God why it had happened. On this time I’m suffering from deep sorrow, I heard about our neighbor’s death. She’s not really a close friend of mine but I know her since I was a child. She’s only 23 years old and pregnant. The night of election, 1:45 am, there was a guy, he’s an addict and was drunk… maybe he was out of his mind that time. He has a gun on his hand and intentionally he hit the girl. The girl is on her due month that time. Unfortunately, she and the baby inside her died because they both hit by the gun. She was rushed in the hospital (trauma center) but she didn’t survive because there was no available doctor on that said hospital. How could it be? No doctor inside a hospital… it was really hospital’s fault because they didn’t try to revive the patient or even the baby inside her womb. She lost much blood and that was the cause of their death.

It was really sad. I really pity the baby inside her. When I feel so pity about myself, I think of them and think of the other people died from a grave cause. The death of that girl is worst than Joey’s death. The guy who killed the baby and the mother will surely go to hell. He has no conscience. He’s really bad. Every time I hear about those kinds of people, I can’t control myself asking God why he’s not getting those kinds. But I know God has his own plan.

Now I realize that I shouldn’t ask God why He took Joey that early. I’m not so miserable than the others. He has His own reason for everything. I just don’t know what it is now. But I will wait for it.

Thumbs Up for it

This will be a late post for the last Election Day. I didn’t have time to post for this event due of some busyness effect of me… hehehe! As good as it was, automated election for me is very good. It was held peacefully though there were some difficulties happened like PCOS machines technical problems, fall in very long lines, having hard times looking for the names and more. i mostly like the special treatment for the pregnant women and senior citizens, they don’t need to fall in a very long line because of their conditions. And because I’m one of them, I had a special treatment too… hehe!

We went to school (place of voting) at 2:00 pm, it was the very good chance to vote because voters were not too many in that time. My cousin was one of the watchers assigned in our precinct so she updated me of the numbers of voters. Right away, she told me to go to school fast and vote. I voted in an instant, I brought with me my leakage so it will be easy for me to shade my ballot because I have the names of the candidates I will vote.

The election was very fast because they don’t need to count manually since there are print outs of the results available in the PCOS machine. So, it was ended early and easily. Good for all the BEIs assigned on that day because it was not necessary for them to do such multi-tasks that will give them hard times and trouble.

I am just hoping that all the leaders won on this day will do what they had promised to people and I’m also begging for their hearts to do their duties and responsibilities with sincerity and honesty. I’m expecting for their good deeds and their big helps in our places and in this country.

How about you? What can you say about the last Election Day?

Thumbs Up for it

This will be a late post for the last Election Day. I didn’t have time to post for this event due of some busyness effect of me… hehehe! As good as it was, automated election for me is very good. It was held peacefully though there were some difficulties happened like PCOS machines technical problems, fall in very long lines, having hard times looking for the names and more. i mostly like the special treatment for the pregnant women and senior citizens, they don’t need to fall in a very long line because of their conditions. And because I’m one of them, I had a special treatment too… hehe!

We went to school (place of voting) at 2:00 pm, it was the very good chance to vote because voters were not too many in that time. My cousin was one of the watchers assigned in our precinct so she updated me of the numbers of voters. Right away, she told me to go to school fast and vote. I voted in an instant, I brought with me my leakage so it will be easy for me to shade my ballot because I have the names of the candidates I will vote.

The election was very fast because they don’t need to count manually since there are print outs of the results available in the PCOS machine. So, it was ended early and easily. Good for all the BEIs assigned on that day because it was not necessary for them to do such multi-tasks that will give them hard times and trouble.

I am just hoping that all the leaders won on this day will do what they had promised to people and I’m also begging for their hearts to do their duties and responsibilities with sincerity and honesty. I’m expecting for their good deeds and their big helps in our places and in this country.

How about you? What can you say about the last Election Day?

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MAMA

She is the most wonderful woman I’ve ever known. She has the beauty inside and out. I really admire her for being the most patient and most lovable girl I’ve ever met. She faced so many trials and problems in life with power. I hope I can be like her even a bit, on how she deals life with toughness and dignity.

I am talking about my mom. My mom who takes care of us since the very first day we were born. Though we’re not as perfect children as every mother wants their children to be, but she loves us with all her heart. I know how she did all her best to support us in every aspect of our lives. She provides best of all the bests. Sometimes, I can feel how hard for her to provide things we know mom can’t afford to give but given that she’s a very good one she is trying all she can to make those things available (in terms of material things). Mom didn’t have good love life… she had her first husband while she was carrying my sister in her womb, that guy left her without any deep reason. Mom suffered being a single parent raising her child (whom is my sister). I know it’s not easy raising your child alone but mom made it without hearing any complains from her. 10 years after that she met my father, they have 2 kids (me and my brother). But as like my half sister’s father, things were just the same. Their relationship didn’t last. As he is not a good father and a good husband. I know how painful it is for mama having two dreadful guys like them. It always touches my heart listening to mama when she's always telling us she had terrible guys before but she has great children now. We’re not great I know but for mama we are ones. That’s how a mother loves her children. She gives unconditional love without expecting in return.

When my husband Joey died from a motor accident 3 months ago, mom takes all his part. She takes care of me as a mom for me and as a grandma and father for my daughter. I can feel her affection for my baby though she hasn’t seen her yet. She even said that all her grand daughters and grand son are the most beautiful in the world. And I’m very sure that wherever Joey is now, he knows that I have a wonderful mom in my side. He will not worry about his daughter, coz he knows that mom will take care of us no matter what.

Now, I’m a soon to be mother. Some people say that mom and I have the same fate but differ in situations. But all I can promise them is that I will be a good mom just like my mom… though I need to accept the fact that I will also raise my child alone as my mom did before but still I will make my child as wonderful child like us.

Ma I would like to thank you for all the things you’ve done for me. Despite of not being a perfect child for you but I know that you know how much I love you. You’re the best person in my life. I always pray to God to give you long life for us to be together. Thank you for taking good care of us, and now it’s my time to take care of you. 1000 words can’t be enough to define and thanked you. But this is the only word I can say,

Happy Mother’s Day to you. We love you MAMA

A Wonderful Start

It was 23^rd of October 2009 when I discovered something changes in me. I felt strange in my body. In hesitant, I decided to buy a pregnancy kit at a drugstore nearby. Without expecting anything, I had a test. I was not that excited about the result coz I’m used to have negative result as always… hehe! But that time was very shocking, the result was positive… my heart was beating so fast and my knees were shaking non-stop. I really couldn’t believe it… I’m pregnant. I have a live human being inside my body. After so many years of waiting, unexpectedly it came. The very great blessing I and Joey waited for so long.

I was taking a bath when I did that test so after having a shower, rapidly I called Joey to tell him the very good news (actually I was totally naked while talking with him, I even forgot to wear anything due of excitement… hehe). I told him the big news and as I was expecting it he was very very happy. He said he will be a daddy soon and he was very excited. So glad we were. We are now new parents. We spread it to all people we know through texts, chats, emails and directly from us.

It’s a very grand present for us. We promised each other to take good care of this baby. We will love this little one as how we love each other.

this is my first positive pregnancy test on which i found out that I'm pregnant.

my first trans-vaginal ultrasound on my 2nd month way.

my fifth month way and found out that my baby is a girl.